Just killing time

Roughly one week ago or so I mentioned that I had to go meet a random doctor since my primary physician was on vacation and as such unavailable, again. I was lucky and have now found myself a new primary physician who actually seems to care. Thus as least one positive thing came out of this situation.

The reason I’m sitting here today, the reason I’m on two antidepressants instead of one, the reason I’m back on anti-anxiety medications is because my physician made an error, both in the way he handled it medically but more importantly his biggest mistake was the complete lack of support and contact. I’m sending the report in today to IVO. Not that that it’s going to do much for me, I just lost another half a year because of amateurism. It’s frustrating beyond comprehension – I did everything I could and he did nothing but to say “quit”. Having researched and consulted a few people I know with expertise in the subject it seems this report should end in criticism, although you can never be sure. It still doesn’t change that I was robbed of what could have been a few good months.

The best part is that I’m going to have to quit with the anti-anxiety medications again, and then quit with the new antidepressants eventually. I went through four weeks of hell, New Year’s Eve and Christmas were both ruined and I’m too tired to do anything – and I’m going to have to go through it again. Right now I’m just trying to find something that I can do so I don’t go crazy but in the end it seems like I’m just killing time. I’ve lost so many years already, why doctors keep making these mistakes with me?

This is fucking pathetic. I apologize for not having any more insightful posts but I’m having a mental block. I did what I could and I got nothing in return, I was abandoned by the healthcare system – again.


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