Small things with great impact

New project still underway

It’s been a while since I last posted, but nothing much has changed – I’m still blogging, but the new venue is not yet finished. It’s incredibly fun and exciting to build something from scratch though, and be a part of something bigger than myself. It also gives me an opportunity to learn how to coordinate with others, compromise, and much more. Although it’s not a job, I do think my experiences with this new project will be beneficial once I’m looking for a job in the future.

In other news, my depression has been improving, although it’s still going up and down; the past couple of weeks have been especially rough. I’ve lowered the dose on Venlafaxine to 150mg, from 300mg, and I started to feel better, but then I became less stable. I was having extreme ups-and downs. I had an appointment with my dietician, where I got some very sound advice regarding snacks between meals. I’m still dealing with a lack of appetite, and the dips in in blood sugar levels didn’t help my depression. This advice I got helped me, a lot.

It’s funny how something so simple can make such a difference. In fairness though, I did make another change a few days prior to this – I changed dose on one of my medications at my own behest. I had to, since my GP was on vacation and my situation worsened. I increased the dose of Lamotrigine from 100mg, twice a day, to 150mg. Combined with eating better, I’m already noticing a vast improvement.

Still, I do need to eat right to be stable, but as long as I do, I’m OK. This was the moral of my little story – the little things you don’t think about and its impact they can have on us.

As I mentioned above, I haven’t stopped blogging, it’s just not being released quite yet. I can’t give a timeline, but imagine it’ll take a few weeks. I’ll keep writing some short posts like this though.

A symbol of my awakening

I’d also like to write a very off topic post about the construction of my home cinema, as a change of pace. (GIF for an animation, the image posted is a panorama taken with my cellphone, hence the low quality.) I’ve had more than a few asking me about it. More importantly, however is that it’s not just a home cinema to me, it’s a symbol for living in the now, and not the future. I’ve always dreamt about having a home cinema – once I moved away from home. I’ve thought about it for the past ten years. I did have a 5.1-sound system before, but it was very low budget. I wanted something real. I had to make compromises with my new home cinema, it’s not perfect, but it’s now, and it is now.

Basically, it’s a symbol of my (non-religious) awakening (Swedish), my attempt to rebuild my life, despite the healthcare system’s betrayal that essentially costed me ten years of my life. I’m making up for lost time, in more ways than one. As I told a nurse at the psychiatric clinic: A forest fire is devastating, but from its ashes, new life will flourish.

Maxa Livet Conference

I’ll write about the home cinema soon, though it might not be what you came here to read about. I hope some will find it enjoyable though. I’ll also write about the Maxa Livet conference I’m going to this weekend. It’s a conference for adult child cancer survivors, and it’s not a boring conference with meetings all day – there are several activities outside of a few lectures planned. I’m not sure exactly what, but some people will do chocolate, I’ve decided to do something random. It might be going to the jacuzzi, or playing pool. Or, something else entirely, we’ll see. I’m very excited about it anyway. Maxa Livet is awesome!

I’ll come back with an update soon(ish), I’m just happy to report that I’m feeling better!


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